Never Leave Me
by Lifes-a-beech7878
Summary: Set after the Shadow-kiss after the attack. Rose takes Dimitri's death hard until she see's Mason and they find him barley holding on to his life (hes not dead nor turned). hey stumble back to the adacemy. What happend's when old foes re-appear and new ones appear. Will they beak-up? Can they stay together? Read and find out... Rated for language. May change as story progresses.
1. Chapter 1

So This is s fanfic that I started writing and am hoping to continue to write. However I cannot be sure of how often I will update. 

**disclaimer: I own nothing it all belongs to Richelle Mead only the story line is mine and any additional characters that may appear in the story.**

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Knocking echoed around my dorm room disturbing the silence, I tried to think of who it could be.  
I checked the bond but Lissa was in the clinic healing others still with Adrian while Christian and Eddie were helping clean the campus up.

"Come in" I said, my voice raspy from the countless sobs making their way up, the door opened slowly, I heard a sharp intake of breath as she looked at me curled up in a messy, bloody heap on my bed.

"What do you want Mother" I asked tiredly

"I wanted to make sure that you were okay and wanted to let you know that I was leaving tomorrow morning…" she trailed off, her eyes widening as I looked up at her for the first time. I guess I looked like crap, my eyes were bloodshot and my cheeks had tear tracks cutting through the dirt, my hair knotted and mussed up while my clothes were the same clothes from 2 days ago. The day we stormed the caves and saved the Moroi and Dampier while killing all the Strigoi, it was also the day that I lost him. That I would never hold him close to me, hear him whisper words to me in Russian. The day my heart was torn in two and the day I stopped truly living…

"I'm fine" she gave me a look saying she doesn't believe me, she took a hesitant step forward from the doorway  
"I know I haven't been the best mother in the world…" she started, I scoffed and rolled my eyes "…I'm sorry. I thought that it was best for you to be here to learn and live so you can become a great guardian and woman once you had grown up" she stopped talking and looked at the ground, her voice sounded different.

Silence filled the room as Janine stood there looking at the ground with her arms wrapped around her body, and me sitting on my bed with my knees up under my chin, my arms around them. I decided that I had to break the uncomfortable silence

"Alberta would tell me that was why I stayed here" I whispered, her head rose slowly to look at me, a tear rolling down her cheek shocked me. THE Janine Hathaway crying was not something that happened every day. I kept going…

"I understood that, I don't hate you for doing what you thought was the best thing for me" her shoulders sagged in relief  
"All I wanted was a visit at least once per year so that I could remember your face or what it felt like to be hugged by my mom. A reply to my Christmas cards, my letters anything so that I knew that even if I couldn't see you that you were still loved me and hadn't forgotten me." My voice cracked at the end as tears rolled down my cheeks one following the next in a steady stream, her cheeks were covered in tears too

"Until I was 10, every birthday and Christmas I would sit in my dorm or in the reception waiting for you to walk through the door, or a present hell even a letter to arrive but nothing came. But Alberta was always there to dry my tears and hold me, doing the things you should have done." I was getting angrier with every word I spoke and could feel spirits darkness filling my mind increasing my anger

"She was my mum and she is more of a mother to me than you will ever be. You left me here as soon as you could. I only knew your face from pictures and from what people told me about you. Lissa's family became my family, they were my sanctuary, and because of them I realized that you were nothing to me, just a name and a barely there face." I stood up ignoring my bodies protest at the change from 2 days in the same position, I stood right in her face our noses barely touching as I looked down at her slightly

"You are nothing to me, just the woman who birthed me and left me to be raised by others" I stormed out of my room as she called for me. I ran down the hallway and out into the courtyard, I paused momentarily blinded by the light from the sun as it was technically night time for us, before I kept running. I could hear her behind me calling out my name, I ran faster away from the school. Soon her calls were getting faint and then stopped all together. Glancing over my shoulder I realized I had run out of the wards and into the forest past where Lissa had been tortured by the mana.

Pausing to check my surroundings and make sure everything was fine I fell to my knees and wept for everything, and everyone I loved. Black tears rolled down my cheeks and dripped off my chin and onto the softy grasses under me, with every drip the grass faded from green into a dull brown and drooped until turning black and rotting into the earth.

_"__Rose"_ a voice whispered so faintly breaking me out of my thoughts, looking around me a lone translucent figure floated close to me nearly touching me,

"Mason" I whispered, he looked so sad as his eyes rested on me before lifting his arm to point, his eyes following his arm.  
Looking at the direction he was pointing I realised he was pointing at the caves  
"Why do you want me there Mase? I have nothing there but bad memories…" my voice cracked as I saw Dimitri being pulled back by the blonde Strigoi, his hand reached out for me his eyes leading with me while his lips yelled for me to run. Shaking my head I cleared the images away when a question popped into my mind. Glancing up at Mason who was still pointing but looking at me with sad frustrated eyes

"Mase… Is he… is he a… a… a Strigoi?" I asked and held my breath, his head shook and his arm began to point frantically towards the caves

"He's dead then" I whispered to myself and my head dropped suddenly too heavy for my shoulders, Mason began to wave his arms to gain my attention. I looked back at him he shook his head and walked towards the caves direction and signalled for me to follow, confused I stood up slowly and followed him. Every step took its toll on me, my heart felt heavy and my head was confused as of why Mason wanted me to return to the caves.

I don't know how long we walked for, well I walked and he floated in front of me, but the sun was starting to fade.  
I opened my mouth to tell Mason that I was sick of walking when I heard a sound, we stopped  
"What was that?" I asked, Mason just looked at me and his mouth twitched as if trying to smile before pointing to my left and waving then disappearing. I stood in silence looking to my left, waiting for something to come crashing through. I heard the sound again it sounded like a groan of pain, the sound of twigs being broken under foot followed it.

I took my fighting stance and pulled out the silver stake that Alberta had given me for the fight and never asked for it back, I took a few hesitant steps forward so as not to be taken by surprise. The groan came again louder this time, I squinted through the big bush from behind which the sound came.  
A dark figure came into view, I lunged through the bush and tackled the dark figure that groaned loudly and hissing in pain. Straddling the figure I pulled up the stake ready to strike when I finally saw who I was straddling.


	2. Chapter 2

**Here's chapter 2. Hope you like it. Let me know :)  
Disclamer: I do not own anything except the plot and any characters that may enter later on from my mind.**

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"Comrade" I whispered in disbelief and dropped my stake in my shock,  
"Roza" he groaned, his eyes were closed tightly and his breathing in short gasps. I jumped off him and knelt next to him on the ground drinking him in and assessing for injuries. His right arm was bent at an odd angle while the other was covered in scratches and dried blood, his duster had been torn to shreds with bits of it hanging off every seam.

His shirt had a huge cut along the left side revealing a deep and seeping gash, the rest of his torso was covered in dried blood and scraps as were his legs and he had lost one of his shoes somewhere along the way.

His neck was the worst where the Strigoi had bitten him and pulled a huge chunk out when Dimitri fought it off. His was bleeding slightly, blood covered his face and soaked into his shirt.

Tears filled my eyes looking at my mentor, my lover, my god, in such a venerable state.  
"I'm so sorry Comrade, I tried to save you but they held me back" I cried and I wanted to hold his hand but I was afraid I would hurt him.

"Shhh my Roza… not your fault…" he managed to get out,

"We have to get you back, Lissa can heal you she will do it for me" I told him, he smiled slightly

"Help me milaya" he whispered and managed to sit up. His gash in his neck and torso began to bleed.

"Shit" he hissed, I pulled my shirt over my head so I was in a singlet, ripped it in half and pressed half it into his side the other I tied around his neck, he groaned and bit his lip to keep from screaming out and a lone tear rolled down his cheek

"Sorry, Comrade" I whispered

"It's fine" he grunted "Help me up" I stood on his left side so I could use my body to hold the shirt in place over his gash while I wrapped my arms under his armpits and pulled him up. Both of us grunting with effort and his also in pain, we stood there him leaning heavily on me so he doesn't fall over,

"Okay Comrade one step at a time" I took one step and braced myself for his step as his weight came all onto me. It was a slow process and before we knew it night time had fallen and we couldn't see in front of us, and both Dimitri and I were covered in sweat our breathing laboured.

"Come on Comrade we need to stop" I told him and waited for him to grunt his understanding "Okay 3, 2, 1" I said as I lowered him to the ground wincing at his sounds of pain.

"Comrade, do we need to be worried about Strigoi?" I asked worried

"No" he grunted

"Good" I sighed and leant against a tree and lifting Dimitri's head onto my lap and began to run my finders through his hair untangling all the knots, he sighed

"Am I hurting you?" I asked

"No, it feels amazing" he sighed

"I love you Comrade" I whispered barely audible and leant down and kissed his forehead gently before leaning my head against the tree

"I'm going to check on Lissa"

"Ok" he murmured voice heavy with sleep

Closing my eyes I focused on Lissa and before I knew it I was looking at Kirova, Janine, Alberta and all the other guardians that were protecting the school as well as the remaining others that had arrived to help with the rescue while Christian had her hand in his holding tightly trying to ground her.

_"__What do you mean she just ran out of the wards?" Lissa shouted, Christian tightened his grip on her hand "What did you do to her?" Janine flinched at the impact her words had._

_"__We talked, I told her I was leaving and she asked me why I even bothered to tell her and then she ran and I tried to follow her but I couldn't keep up and I lost sight of her. I have no idea where she went" _

_"__Princess, you and Rosemarie are _different"_ she emphasised different to protect our bond "Does it allow you to find her?" she asked_

_"__No, only Rose can" she replied, looking around the room everyone's faces were confused on what was being said except for those who knew about it. My mother looked so guilty and confused _

_"__I am sorry Guardian Hathaway and Princess Dragomir but we can't afford anymore guardians to try and find one trouble novice who as I recall being told was trying to return into the caves after being given a direct order to return and bring back the injured" Kirova announced looking guilty, Lissa's anger began to rise in her as Janine sat there stone faced as she hid all her emotions from the others in the room._

_"__But she is the best novice in this school and will become my guardian, she is my other half. You need to find her please…" tears flowed down her cheeks "Please I almost lost her once, I can't lose her again" she sobbed and Christian pulled her in to his arms_

_"__Liss, it will be okay. This is Rose we're talking about, she's tough and she will find her way back to you" he whispered in her ear before turning to face Kirova_

_"__Can we go now?" she nodded. Christian pulled Lissa up and out the door, they stood behind the closed door listening to Kirova speak. _

_"__I know that Rosemarie is a very talented novice and will one day become a great guardian however, this is the second time she has run away and that cannot be tolerated. If she returns to the school you are to bring her straight here and I shall deal with her and what her future will entail but at the moment it looks to me as though she will be expelled" a cry of outrage sounded in the room_

_"__You can't do that! Where will she go? She can't stay with me" Janine yelled_

_"__I'm sorry Guardian Hathaway but rules are rules" Kirova replied strictly _

_Lissa whimpered quietly, Christian pulled her to his side and took her to his dorm room where they lay down on his bed wrapped in each other's arms. Lissa sobbed into his chest while he just held her tightly whispering assurances into her ear. Her thoughts scared me she couldn't stop thinking that if she had paid more attention to me after the attack that I wouldn't have run off and that she was a horrible friend that only used everybody. _

I could feel the darkness swirling around in her head I pulled it into me, I felt her relax and the depressing horrible thoughts faded.  
_"Please Rose come back, I need you. I'm sorry" _she whispered to me through the bond.


	3. Chapter 3

**sorry this is shorter than the other 2 ones**. **Hopefully I will post again soon.  
Thank-you for reviewing and supporting me.**

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I got pulled back to my own body, something startled in the dark making a noise. My hand stilled in his hair as I looked around trying to figure out what it was,

"What's wrong Roza? Is Lissa okay?" he whispered, I stayed silent and looked around us. The sun was beginning to rise, a slight reddening of the sky gave us enough light to see outlines of shapes.

"She's okay. I thought I heard something" looking around us again a bush rustled "something moved" we sat in silence, both of us straining to hear what was going on, there was another noise and movement from our right. I gently lifted his head off my lap and stood up

"Roza?" he whispered worry colouring his voice

"I'll be right back Comrade" I leant down and pressed a light kiss to his forehead before turning and walking towards where the sound was. Reaching for the stake from my pocket I realised that I had dropped it when I found Dimitri and had left it behind, silently cursing I reached down and grabbed a large branch from the ground and held it like a bat.

I crept forward listening to the sound. Reaching forward I pushed the greenery back prepared to fight. I released the breath I had held in, and walked back to Dimitri and sat down putting his head back onto my lap "Just a deer" I told him, he nodded and winced. I began to run my fingers through his hair again

"We should start heading back soon Comrade, before it gets too hot"

"Ok, let's go" he said and tried to sit up. Helping him to sit I asked him if he was sure he was ready he just nodded and proceeded to try to stand.

We walked for hours in silence both of us concentrating on not collapsing, him from pain and me from the weight followed by pain of me practically carrying him.

"Comrade" I puffed "I… I need to stop"

"Yeah, me too" he replied, I eased him to the ground and flopped next to him both our breathing ragged.

"Roza, can I ask you a question?" Dimitri asked softly after our breathing had returned to normal

"Yeah" I replied, he was quiet for a while and as I was about to ask him what's wrong he spoke

"Are you ok?" his question shocked me I expected something harder

"Ahh, yeah I'm fine. Why? What are you thinking about?" he exhaled loudly

"It's just…" he paused, his eyes closed and a frown appeared

"Just?" I asked and sat up on my elbow to look at his face, he looked in pain and he was trying to sort something out

"Never mind" he said suddenly "Let's go I want to get out of here"

"Okay" I said slowly, and got up slowly lifting him too.

We began our awkward walk towards the school, my mind full of possibilities of what Dimitri was going to say. The sun was chasing us every step of the way, my legs burned from all the extra weight put on my joints, I stumbled on a branch. Biting my lip to try to smother my groan however Dimitri's yelp tore through me worse than the stumble.

"I'm sorry" I muttered, his breathing came out in ragged puffs "You are doing amazing Comrade, we're nearly there" I kissed his hand and watched my feet checking to make sure that I would not trip again.

"Roza" Dimitri whisper/groaned  
"What is it?"  
"Look"  
At his words I looked ahead of us to see…  
"Is that…" I whispered in awe  
"Yes" he replied  
"Our cabin" I murmured breathlessly.

Our feet pushed us faster to where we can get help. We were probably 7 feet from the cabin when the door flew open revealing Stan followed by Yuri both brandishing their stakes. We paused in our approach, all of us just staring at each other waiting for the other to make a move.

Dimitri drooped more against me, causing both of us to fall to the ground with Dimitri landing on me. He yelled in pain while I grunted, Yuri and Stan came running towards us, Stan talking rapidly into his radio calling for immediate assistance while Yuri was gently getting Dimitri off of me so I could sit up.

When I was sitting I moved by Dimitri's head putting it onto my lap and gently ran my fingers through his hair trying to relax him slightly as Yuri and Stan assessed his injuries. Soon we were surrounded by guardians and two were carrying a stretcher for Dimitri, they moved forwards with Dr Olendanski who quickly assessed him before nodding to the Guardians to put him onto the stretcher. Then she turned to me and did a quick check before telling me to go shower and sleep and disappeared, leaving me with Stan to escort me to my room to rest before going to see Kirova.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry it has taken me long to update but I hope I can keep updating. Unfortunately it wont be regular but yeah.**

You all know the Disclamer **I don't own anything except for perhaps some future characters blah blah blah.**

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I slept for what felt like forever but in reality was only 3 hours before nightmares plagued me, replaying the events of the cave over and over again. With each replay my heartbeat gets worse and worse, my chest burns, I try to scream but no sound comes out. Finally I sit up, my eyes open wide and survey the room. Covered in sweat I get up and shower and change taking note of all of my injuries before making my way out to the quad to find Lissa.

Halfway down the stairs I come face to face with Stan. He scowls at me as I sigh and move to go around him when his hand shoots out and grips my forearm successfully stopping me.  
"What" I glare at him as he pulls me in front of him  
""I'm sorry Rose" he says looking me in the eyes, his filled with sadness. My mind thinks of Dimitri, he's dead. My eyes widen and fill with tears  
"Rose I have to take you to Kirova, she is not happy with you" he frowns and turns pulling me with him  
"Is Dimi- Guardian Belikov ok?" I ask quietly hoping my voice doesn't shake  
"He is fine. Princess Vasilisa healed him He is sleeping now regaining his strength." I sighed and relaxed letting myself be pulled along by Stan.

"Rose, we are here" he says as he knocks on Kirova's doors  
"Come in" her voice filters through the door, Stan gives me one more sorrow filled look before pushing open the doors and entering, me following behind.  
She sat in her chair looking just like a vulture, glasses at the end of her nose. She looked up from her desk, she pursed her lips and frowned as she saw it was me.

"Rosemarie Hathaway, delivered as asked Headmistress" Stan said formally and pulled me forward to sit in front of Kirova.  
"Thank-you Guardian Alto, please find Guardian Petrov and ask her to come here as fast as you can" Stan nodded and turned on his heal closing the door behind him leaving Kirova and I in a heavy silence.

"Rosemarie"  
"Rose" I cut her off, she glared at me and we sat in silence for 5 minutes both glaring at each other when the doors flew open and in came Alberta with a pissed off look on her face, she came and stood beside me a hand resting on the back of the chair with her fingers resting on my shoulder.

"Headmistress Kirova, you called for me" she spoke emotionless, her face covered in her guardian mask.  
"Ah, yes Guardian Petrov. I want you here to help me decide what to do with _novice _Hathaway" Kirova said putting emphasis on novice to remind me that I am not a guardian.  
"She should stay" Alberta spoke with certainty, Kirova's face screwed up at this  
"Please tell me why?"  
"She has been a valuable asset to this school especially when we were attacked, herself and Lord Ozrea killed over half. During our raid on the caves she was fearless and acted as a true Guardian. Although this started out as an escape from herself she brought back one of our best Guardians, Belikov." Alberta paused to see what Kirova's reaction to her words were. Kirova stared blankly at me,

"She has shown that she is a good fighter" she paused looking at both Alberta and I "However she is reckless, insubordinate and doesn't think before doing anything, she has caused so much destruction, has a foul mood and a hot temper. Do these qualities sound like the making of a good Guardian to you Guardian Petrov, especially one who is supposed to be guarding the Dragomir Princess?"

"Headmistress you seem to forget how much growth and progress Rose has made since she was brought back by Belikov. How many times has she been in this office these past 6 months compared to the 6 months prior to leaving, prior to Belikov and her training? She has become an example for all the novices and juniors and every student in this school that hard work and determination you can overcome obstacles including yourself." Alberta finished with a nod.

Kirova and I sat there speechless, I wanted to say something but I thought it best to bite my tongue.

"Thank-you Guardian Petrov" Kirova says, "You may leave" she dismissed her and turned her gaze to me.  
"Very well Headmistress" Alberta nodded and squeezed my shoulder before turning to leave, just as she was exiting she turned "Before you decide you really should talk to Belikov about this. He is after all her mentor and knows her better than you or I". With that she disappeared.

Once again left in silence with Kirova, both of us just staring at one another.  
"Can I go now?" I asked bored of being here, she shook her head  
"Not yet Rose." I swallowed nervously

"I know you have not been the best student here but I must admit that you have greatly improved in both skills and in behaviour. We have never seen eye to eye, I think we can both agree" I nodded but kept silent "so once this school has been fixed up you will be on probation just like when you came back, and you must report to Alberta before and after all breaks and be in your room half an hour before curfew." I opened my mouth to protest but thought better of it, after all she had talked about expelling me with Lissa. She gave me a pointed look to shut me up "Now you are free to do as you please within the schools rules and restriction until normal classes progress when your probation takes effect."

I grinned and had to hold myself back from jumping up to give her a hug.  
"Thank-you Headmistress Kirova, I won't let you down" We both stood she shook my hand and told me to go, I pretty much ran out of the room and looked through the bond to find Lissa. She was at the clinic which was a bonus so I can see Dimitri too.


End file.
